Posts Tagged ‘the bible retold’

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IF Comp ’10 – Ben Pennington’s The Bible Retold: The Lost Sheep!

November 9, 2010

I really want to play something that isn’t going to confuse me, and I suspect the lost sheep game is going to… what is it you do with bills, fit them or fill them?  Do you know, imaginary Walter Mondale murder puppet?  No, you don’t.  You don’t know because you aren’t real.  Back in the imaginary Walter Mondale murder puppet bucket for you, then!*

Well, whatever it is you do with bills, I am expecting this lost sheep game to go down as follows:
1)  I lose a sheep.
2)  I look for that sheep.
3)  I locate that sheep, resulting in cheers, applause, and the procurement of more tang than a space astronaut.
It is possible the game will vary significantly from these constraints, but man, I really hope not.

*  Internal dialogue had by me about this paragraph:
“Dude, you’re taking this paragraph to a weird weird place, and I’m not sure your audience will be willing to go there with you.”
“Oh, come on, man, I’m just letting off steam after playing The Blind House!  Mainly, though, I really like the sound of ‘Walter Mondale murder puppet.'”
“You have a point.  Can we put him in a Walter Mondale murder puppet bucket?”
“I believe we are obligated to, yes.”
“Hey, if two Walter Mondale puppets fight a robot in a bucket, and that robot’s made of rubber, and the bucket’s full of blubber, and the blubber’s getting sour, and the robot’s using tires, and the tires are on fire…”
“It’s a rock-’em sock-’em sour blubber bucket Walter Mondale murder puppet rubber robot dire fire tire battle.  Yes.”
“And if Frodo’s involved?”
“It’s a rock-’em sock-’em sour blubber bucket Walter Mondale murder puppet rubber robot dire fire tire battle for the fate of the Shire.  Come on, we can’t put off this Bible game forever.”

[spoilers begin here]

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IF Comp ’10 – Justin Morgan’s The Bible Retold: Following A Star!

October 27, 2010

Chessmen cookies!  I forgot I bought these!  Oh my God chessmen cookies!  Erin the person who I don’t know what her job title is said her brother once got his hand caught in the machine that seals those Pepperidge Farm bags to the point of inopenability and he had foil stuck to his bones. I asked her if they pulled too hard trying to get it off and all his organs sprayed across the room, but she said no.  Oh man chessmen cookies.  This is exciting.

What?  These cookies do not feature chessmen!  These cookies are all covered in mistletoe and wreaths and shit!  It is not Christmas!  I am not ready for it to be Christmas!  That settles it.  I’ll have to eat them all.

Also, I think that means God wants us to play a Bible game.  You know.  The one about Christmas.

[spoilers begin here]

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