The hype on Blue Lacuna is that it is a Big Important Thing, probably the Biggest Importantest Thing of 2009. This is awesome for me because it means I can spend the next ten months on some island somewhere drinking fruity girl drinks with small plastic lizards in them. “Well, it was no Blue Lacuna,” I will say. I will say this when called upon to review a game that is not Blue Lacuna, but also I will say this all the time.
“Would you like another fruity girl drink?”
“Well, it was no Blue Lacuna.”
“Do you know what year it is?”
“Well, it was no Blue Lacuna.”
“Please, miss, that is the last remaining fruitbat! I beg you, do not destroy our delicate ecosystem!”
“Well, it was no Blue Lacuna.”
The game is available for download here (well, for Windows and Mac it is, Linux users are offered “instructions for download,” step one of which I suspect is “build another computer with a copy of the game already on it.” * ) I am going to start playing it tonight. Part one of the review will be up on Tuesday, then additional parts as needed on whatever those days are called that come after Tuesday. These are going to be absolutely full of spoilers, so I would suggest not reading them until you’re confident you’ve played more of the game than I have, or, to be completely safe, all of the game that you are ever going to play in your entire life.
* Steps two and three, as always, are “masturbate” and “cry”.
Pissy Little Sausages 