So, I feel weird about this, but.

May 4, 2013

I have been learning about ebooks.  If, while I was doing that, you were busily harboring a secret desire to give me money for my bullshit, your chance has come.  (It’s pay-what-you-want, because probably your secret desire is to give me and my bullshit the smallest amount of money possible, and I fully support you in that.)

My practice ebook took six hours to write.  It’s quite short, and wildly uneven in quality.  Mostly about poop, and Peach & Mario’s sex life.  There are nonsensical instructions on how to make a dragon out of fish, and really skinny eyebrows for the moon.  There’s a guy called Harpsichordus Repairmagnet and the almost-adventures of Waffles the gentleman thief for whom I was too tired to actually write any adventures.  It might be worth a dollar, if you are the kind of person who runs around the zoo throwing dollars at ostriches.  It is probably definitely worth at least less than that.

Anyway, it’s a thing.

We shall never speak of it again.

(Update:  Well, damn, someone bought the thing at the ostrich price.  I’m up 56 cents!)


  1. I have purchased your book. I had to pay a strange amount so that you could get exactly $1.50, because I wanted you to get at least a dollar and then I got into that zone where you try to put just enough gas in your car to be a specific dollar amount. A bit more fragmentary stream of consciousness-y than I was prepared for (but just a bit, because I already was expecting it to be pretty much that way) but worth the $2.13 just for the bit with the astronauts heading into the sun. Thanks for making this morning kind of strange.

    • Gosh, thank you for purchasing my book, and for confirming my theory on why $2.13, because that was gonna drive me nuts. You are welcome for the kind of strange morning.

  2. Truly, honestly, for realsies, the BEST DOLLAR I HAVE EVER SPENT. And I’m not being snarky because I live in the UK where we use guineas instead. I mean this is the best value for money I’ve ever had. Please force yourself to stay up every night and write an ebook, and I will buy all of them*.

    *Unless I have spent all of my ‘dollars’ on food and rent.

  3. Hurrah! I hope you make your 73 copies.

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