It’s been several days since my past self blithely promised to write up some sort of cohesive opinion on Blue Lacuna, then skipped off into the sunset without considering me (Future Her) or my needs. Selfish bitch. In the intervening time I have been doing quite a bit of thinking. For one thing, I’ve thought about how much it would suck if one’s lover were to eat one’s eyeballs.
No, seriously, that’d be pretty traumatic, don’t you think? So traumatic that you’d probably repress it, and when they came to pick you up from the hospital you would go along without a qualm, maybe even feeling grateful to them for staying with you, and all the time they’d – oh, no, wait, what if they hadn’t eaten your eyeballs after all; what if they had removed them and shellacked them and mounted them on a pair of sproingy antennae and wore them all the time and you never knew because you couldn’t see because they were wearing your eyeballs as antennae. That would be horrible.
Also I thought about Gilligan’s Island syndrome (when the main character’s desires, if fulfilled, would end the story) and whether or not it only happens in episodic-type media, and I thought about what it would be like if everyone’s name changed depending on where they were and what they were doing (confusing and stupid, I decided: everyone’s driver’s license, for example, would be made out to StandingintheDMV Fillingoutaform), and I wrote a whole big thing comparing the female version of Blue Lacuna’s main character and the male version of her lover to Ayla and Jondalar from Clan of the Cave Bear, but this turned out to be one of those things that’s more fun for me to write than it is for you to read, and honestly, it wasn’t that much fun to write.
So. Final thoughts. Blue Lacuna. You’re getting ‘em. They might not be all pretty and writerly-looking. They might be more like someone squatted over this blog and crapped out Spam. (The potted meat food product, not the internet term.) You have been warned.
Edit: Oh, right, the spoiler-free version for people who have not yet played the game. It’s a good game. Play it. That was easy.
[spoilers crapped out below]